Southeast Asia Epilogue: Koh Laoliang - Koh Lipe - Kuala Lumpur

Three days at Koh Laoliang wasn't enough time. I only sent one of my projects (a really steep and fun 7b+).

Jonathan and Rachel had to catch a flight on January 6th, and Jeanna had to get up to Phuket. I had four days to get to Singapore so I could fly home. I decided to hop a tiger-lines ferry to Koh Lipe. If you ever have a choice of boats to take in the Andaman sea, and Tiger lines is one of them - don't bother. It's a poorly run business with lousy customer service, boats that are never on time and never look that sea-worthy and outrageously high prices. It did get me to my destination though.

Koh Lipe. This is what I came here for - I think... If you are a climber, and you go to Koh Lipe, go ahead and take your shoes: there are a few granite (not limestone!) boulders in Turutao National Park.

I arrived at Koh Lipe thinking I could just walk around a nice beach, and find a cheap place to stay. Nope. That was 10 years ago. Good luck now. Koh Lipe is as over-run with tourists as any typical beach destination. The prices are fairly high, so book early to find the best deals.

I found an over-priced very large family-sized room for 1500 Bhat per night, as there wasn't much available on a saturday afternoon.

I went snorkeling with one of the local tour operators in Turutao National Park the next day. It was worth it. Great views, beautiful beaches, and good snorkeling. The only downside was that the closer you look at the "pristine" beaches, the more plastic you will find.

Great beaches in Turutao National Park. Park regulations forbid permanent dwellings (read: "resorts) from being built on these islands. I think that's a good thing... ...This was painful to see: plastic on the most remote beaches of Turutao National Park... Turutao beachesA young local staying cool on a hot day. It doesn't matter how good you look in a swimsuit - there is still no excuse for feeding the monkeys. Koh Lipe is a great spot to go if you want to get tan, get drunk, and spend money. It's also a great spot to base yourself if you are a keen diver and want to explore the underwater portions of Turutao National Park.

On my third day I took a ferry to Langkawi, Malaysia. The ferry was delayed so I had to run through Malaysian border control with a couple of Italians and a Canadian in order to find a taxi to drive us over to the airport, where we were all flying to Kuala Lumpur. Somehow we made it, and that night I was enjoying good Chinese food and good conversation in a downtown night market. I strolled over to the base of the Patronus Towers with a fellow traveler from the Koh Lipe and Langkawi flight. Kuala Lumpur is a modern city with a gritty underbelly. It's a fun city to visit, has great, cheap, transportation, and a sizeable ex-pat population. It didn't really stand out from too many other cities though;  sometimes I feel like they're all the same...

Petronas Towers, Kuala Lumpur. I took this photo with my iphone 4. KL tower from Little India.

On my one full day to enjoy the city, I took a bus to the Batu Caves, where there is a 50-meter-tall statue of the Hindu Deity Murugan stands guard next to the 272 steps ascending into a spectacular example of Karst and chemical weathering of limestone. I took my climbing gear with me (this is western Malaysia's most famous climbing area) but couldn't find anyone to join. So instead I took a few photos, watched monkeys steal food from ignorant tourists, and then returned to Kuala Lumpur downtown on a very cheap train.

The 42 meter statue of Hindu Deity Murugan, and the 272 stairs that ascend to the entrance of the Batu Caves. Inside the Batu CavesIt's as if Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich have already helped Malaysia with their gender related social policy.

A kindle and a cup of hot, spiced, sweet Indian tea - one of my preferred ways of passing a hot afternoon in Kuala Lumpur.
I spent my last evening dining out once again, snapping photos of Kuala Lumpur Tower in the moonlight, and then chatting with fellow travelers at the Back Home Hostel. The next morning, a 5-hour luxurious bus ride (don't take the train, unless you want to only for the "romance") to Singapore. I took a nap at my hotel, then embarked on 20 hours of air travel back to my home in Chamonix. October 22nd to January 11th - a great adventure in the southern hemisphere and the Southeast Asian tropics!

Thailand part III - Koh Laoliang

 Rain-invoked exodus from Tonsai - January 2nd, 2012

The rain has driven us away. LOTS of rain. Several inches - overnight...

Capsized Long-tails at Ao Nang

Jonathan is not a big fan of rough water. Happy to unload from a bumpy trip from Tonsai...Apparently there is nothing out of the ordinary when 5 inches of rain falls in 18 hours

Jonathan catching up on the news of the weather.

After nearly a month in Tonsai, it's hard to decide what to do with life after Tonsai. Where do we go? What do we do? How will we survive in the real Southeast Asia - a foreign land that isn't full of English-speaking, bikini-and-surf-trunk-wearing, hard-drinking beach tourists?

We departed Tonsai in a storm of biblical proportions. Jonathan, Rachel, Jeanna, and I climbed aboard one of the few non-capsized Long-tail boats early in the morning on January 2nd (heavy rains on new-years day had filled many of the Ao Nang Long-Tails with enough rain water to capsize them. Our destination was the small, secluded island of Ko LaoLiang- where we would spend 1500 Thai Bhat per day for 3 meals a day, lodging (in a large, car-camping-style tent), and the privilege of walking 50 meters from one's tent to the crag.

Instead of making it to Koh Laoliang that day, we chose to dry out in the cheap hotel rooms of Krabi. We decided Krabi would be worth a day's visit. We found a cheap hotel, deposited our bags, and flagged down a Tuk-Tuk driver to take us to Wat Tham Sua (the Tiger Cave Temple), where we planned to walk up the 1230 monkey-infested steps to the summit viewpoint.

The Tuk-tuk broke down 100m from the entrance to Wat Tham Sua. How convenient. We payed our driver, and entered the monastery.

The view from the top was 360 degrees of goodness. We could see the 150 meter - thick Karst extending inland from the Railey/Tonsai area. Plenty more climbing out there for those with a machete and a penchant for cleaning steep limestone infested with some of the world's most venomous critters!

The only thing that detracted from the view was the sheer volume of Palm Oil plantations visible in the distance. Malaysia has deforested even more of their native forest in support of Palm Oil production (one of the important ingredients in your "bio-diesel).

We braved the monkeys and 50-meter all-seeing Buddhas and found a Tuk-Tuk to return us to Krabi for some exquisite and cheap food at the fisherman's night market on Thanon Khongka street.

View from the top the Tiger Cave Temple

please don't feed the monkeys - I don't want them biting me...

Fisherman's night market in Krabi - good food if you can take the heat!The next morning, we drove south, through Trang, to Koh Hat Yao and took a one-hour Long-tail boat ride to Koh LaoLiang. The 200-meter long beach at Koh Lao Liang was Idyllic, pristine, and quiet - just what we were looking for. It was surrounded by 100 meter cliffs, and impenetrable vegetation. Koh Laoliang resort aims to continue their presence in an "eco-friendly" manner. 60 people is the maximum allowed population. Permanent, concrete-supported structures have been eschewed in favor of large, comfortable family-sized tents (I found the tents to be significantly more bug and snake proof than the typical beach bungalows of Tonsai, etc). The price of 1500 bhat per day includes three meals, access to clean drinking water, and your tent. All fresh water must be brought to the island, so disciplined use is encouraged. That said, comfortable showers and sinks are available for rinsing off the sweat and salt water. The food is pretty good (not as good as the Krabi Night Market) and beer is available for a cheap price on a self-served honor-system basis at the thatch-roofed beach bar. They've got kayaks and snorkeling kits available for free for those who want to explore.

If you want to climb in thailand, see good scenery, avoid being surrounded by hords of tourists, and perhaps leave a smaller mark on the landscape, you should go to Koh Laoliang.

Here are some photos from Koh Laoliang:

Our captain - from Koh Hat Yao to Koh LaoliangEvery morning, it's a 10 foot walk from your tent to this view...

 The Koh Laoliang beach. The cragging is on the cliff at center.

Jonathan at the crux of one of his 7a projects. Jonathan Spitzer, solving crux sequences.. JS looking excited about the fixed gear he's about to clip. One of my favorite memories - the Koh Laoliang peanut gallerylifting the sun up on a lazy Thai morning

Thailand Part II: The bad - and the ugly!

It would be unfair to paint Tonsai as a picture-perfect vacation paradise devoid of problems. Yeah sure, you have beaches, warm water, bikinis, reggae parties, cheap food, and some of the worlds' shortest approaches. But beneath all the fun, games, food, and bolts lies a nasty underbelly of rude climbers, heaps of trash, and agressive tourist-fed monkeys who would love to tear your wallet into confetti. I encountered a few different examples - take them as warnings. 

The first warning I'll offer: Don't assume the climbers in Tonsai will all be friendly -even if you come from a friendly, fraternal climbing community back home. Case in point: Angry Bob. Angry Bob is a long-term british denizen of Tonsai. He's dreadlocked and tatooed, but so are 80% of the other Tonsai residents. You'll recognize Angry Bob by his lack of smiles, and his propensity to yell at you for not doing it his way. "Doing it" may include everything from flaking your rope out improperly, to hanging on a bolt for too long, to not ever (AND I MEAN NEVER!) bouldering at the bottom of Dums Kitchen. You can normally overhear him muttering his despleasure of having to share the beach and crag with so many recent arrivals who "just don't know how good it was 10 years ago". 

Don't like crowds? Don't climb at Tonsai Roof! or.....

...climb at high tide!Even Norwegians can be unfriendly in Thailand. My friends would be shocked to hear me say this - they all know I'm a big fan of the Norsk, their culture, their blond hair, and they're polar exploration history. One day Jonathan, Rachel, and I were searching for an open route somewhere between Tonsai Roof (aka "muscle beach") and Dums Kitchen. Angry Bob had already lambasted me for committing the unforgivable sin of bouldering to warm up, so we moved into the shady alcove behind the right side of Tonsai Roof. We flailed on "jumping for Jugs" (the worst 6c+ ever), and looked for something else open nearby. "Wake and Bake" (7a+), a pretty little climb in a corner, was open except for the rope hanging off of it. We asked the two Norwegians on the adjacent route if we could get on it. We were refused access, then given the excuse that "I'm leaving the rope on it for my Girlfriend"

"When will she climb it?" we asked.

"When I finish climbing this route. "She's waiting for me to belay her on it". 

"We could belay her, since you'll be occupied with this route for a while".

"She's waiting for me at the restaurant".

We began to find that route-hogging was quite common in Tonsai, and it doesn't matter which nationality one belong's to. A Venezuelan and Dutch guy successfully blocked all traffic from Lars and Lars (7a) for a few hours, while they dangled on it try after try after try. Some fellow Americans clogged up the Groove Tube (6a) for the better part of an afternoon. They successfully blocked all efforts for anyone to climb it - even if the newcomers were willing to que up - by allowing access to passing friends as they walked by: "oh Hey Bro! Haven't seen you since that reggae party last night! You want to take a TR burn on Groove Tube? We've got a rope on it!!"

Somehow, climbers in Tonsai have developed the mentality that, once your rope is at the bottom of the route, its yours as long as you want it (or as long as you "act" like you want it).

Tonsai is a great place to see some bad belaying: In this photo, Jonathan stares in awe as a gentleman from Korea gives his wife about 20 feet of penalty slack (she was in the crux when I took the photo).

Perhaps rude climbers are but a simple and acceptable aspect of climbing at Tonsai. Rude-climber syndrome can be combated by using several techniques: get up early; hire Long-tail boats and go multipitch climbing; leave Tonsai and go to Koh LaoLiang. Of greater concern to me was the obvious environmental disaster slowly taking place on Thailand's resort beaches and remote islands.

Along the horseshoe-shaped walking trail that connects the bungalow resorts of Tonsai with the beach, bars, and each other, there are several large garbage piles strewn throughout the forest. I had originally thought some of the garbage piles could have been left over from the Boxing Day Tsunami that devastated beach resorts in the Andaman Sea on December 26th, 2004. One would hope though, that after 8 years someone would get around to removing them. I finally realized that - without goverment-mandated waste management - there is no incentive for local resorts to put garbage on Long Tail boats departing for the mainland. As a result, thousands of plastic smoothie and shake cups, water bottles, and plastic bags, hundreds of beer bottles, and countless paper plates, spoons and forks litter the forests of Tonsai (and other Island resorts). The stink of the garbage piles is revolting. Crab-eating Macaques hover in the trees above the ad hoc dumps - stealing the most attractive pieces of plastic for their own entertainment.

Use the contents of the big 20L bottle (left) to fill the 1L bottle (right). Less plastic waste!

After leaving Tonsai, I spent several days on Koh Lipe (what some refer to as "what Koh Pipe was like 10 years ago). I snorkeled off of "pristine" white sand beaches in Turutao National Park. The beaches were beautiful - no doubt about that. But at the high tide line of each beach, a line of plastic refuse was strewn from end to end. One would have to wade over decomposing plastic bags and bottles to arrive at the shore from the Long Tail boat. I went for a trail run behind the village of Koh Lipe on my last day. I got lost, and ended up jogging right next to the dump. A crude wire fence was all that sepearted tons and tons of poorling packaged garbage from the Andaman sea. Gulls landed amongst the waste bags, carrying away what their talons could carry.

Is there anything you can do?

1) Don't by bottled water in 1L bottles. Yes, of course you want to avoid drinking the unsanitary tap water, but the best solution is to pay a 150 baht deposit for a 5 gallon mega-bottle that you can carry back to your bungalow. Use this large bottle to re-fill the bottles you brought from home! No waste! When you finish with the bottle you can return it for a refill of clean drinking water - or turn it in and get your deposit back.

2) bring your favorite 16oz plastic coffee/drinl mug from home to enjoy endless, cheap, coconut mango shakes. Some of the shake shops make 100's of shakes per day - and most of those 100's of plastic cups end up in the forest behind the beach. The rest end up in the ocean.

3) Bring a rubbermaind/tupperwear bowl with lid to order takeaway meals, pancakes, etc.. Either that, or insist that your meal is served on a piece of Banana Tree leaf (some places will do that as a standard).

4) If you buy a large supply of booze on the mainland, buy beer in aluminum cans - not bottles. In Thailand, there is a market for aluminum to recycle, but unfortunately not for glass.

5) Don't feed monkeys. Yeah sure, even the locals do it, so it must be ok, right? Just don't. Feeding wildlife is a bad idea - especially when said wildlife is smart enough to break into your bungalow and steal your passport.

 Don't feed the monkeys!

Tonsai, Thailand Rock Climbing, Part 1: The good!

Tonsai Beach from HumanalityWhen the weather the Antarctic deep-field is good, there's almost nowhere I'd rather be.

HOWEVER - ask just about anyone as they lie - stormbound in a flapping Scott tent, smelly, and deprived of good alcohol and fresh food - where they'd rather be, and you might hear:

"I just wanna be on a BEACH right now".  The person who utters this then lapses into 10 minutes of daydreaming about what life would be like without 6 layers of stinky synthetic clothing on, what fresh fruit smoothies might taste like, and the idea of seeing bikinis and bare, tan skin in real life - not in a magazine.

Perhaps I exercised good foresight then, when in McMurdo station in late October, I clicked "purchase" on a December 10th Tiger Airways flight from Singapore to Krabi, Thailand.

First long-tail boat ride to TonsaiI think this is what I came here for.

I had never been to Southeast Asia, and I was sick of all my friends telling me how cheap, beautiful, and amazing it was. In Mid December, I finished my "flycation" - having climbed almost nothing (but paraglided nearly every day)in Wanaka, New Zealand. I headed north to Singapore, where I inadvertently spent one night in a cheap hotel in the red-light district (be very careful when reserving hotel rooms online from Kayak.com!). My US$80 Tiger Airways ticket took me from the budget terminal at Changi Airport to Krabi, where I re-entered the "developing world" for the first time since guiding a Bolivia trip in 2005.

I promptly went to Tonsai (doesn't every climber?) and ensconced myself in a cheap bungalow supporting a robust assemblage of jungle flora, as indicated by the thin layer of insect fecal matter coating the top surface of my mosquito net. Within a few days I moved from my bungalow at Basecamp to a slightly tidier one at Green Valley Resort. Within days, I had spotted a yellow-banded Krait (highly venomous) living beneath my floorboards. Oh well I guess that's just part of the fun of traveling here.

flora outside of my front door (on a rain day).

One day as I was walking back to my bungalow a Keel-bellied whip snake fell out of a tree with an Agama lizard in it's mouth.

Each morning I woke early (thank you jet lag!), walked to the beach, drank a coconut mango shake, bought some fresh banana bread, and strolled past the Tonsai Roof area (a few of us nick-named it "muscle beach - it's the place to climb if you're sporting a healthy narcissism-gene) to Dum's Kitchen or the Tyrolean Wall, where I would ask politely if someone wanted a climbing partner for the day. Usually I found one. I climbed with a hodgepodge of English, American, Dutch, French, Belgian, Quebecoise, South African, and Australian partners during my first week in Tonsai.

Yours truly getting a belay from Rich on "Lao Bab", a nice 7a+ (5.12a) before the tide comes in...

One of the strongest climbers in Tonsai.
Jonathan Spitzer and Rachel Greeberg arrived a few days later. Our international breakfast-socializing crew was complete.  I now had more climbing partners than I could shake a stick-clip at. Jonathan, Rachel, Rich, Darran, Marilyne, Jason, and countless others could be found (with yours truly) holding court at Pyramid cafe, making unambitious plans for the day before ordering more chai and turning back to their book. We spent lazy mornings, afternoons and evenings drinking coffee, pricing out which shop sold the cheapest toilet paper, drinking beer, falling off of slack lines, and debating the outcome of a battle between a feral cat and crab-eating Macaque.

Jonathan and Rachel on "Jumping for Jugs" on Tonsai (muscle beach) roof. This 6c+ route was horrible. Jonathan, Darran, and Rich betwixt beach and bar.

We generally sought out the most titanium-rich crags, as stainless steel bolts of all forms have proven their lack of durability in the hot, salty, marine environment. On several occasions, we climbed multi-pitch routes. Humanality was highly recommended by friends, and therefore became our first. The route is four or five pitches directly above the freedom bar. It involves one pitch of 5.9+ tree-root climbing to get off the ground Sadly, most climbers avoid this pitch by starting at the ladder routes at Tonsai Roof. Even more sadly, this is because the ground below the tree is littered with smelly garbage, fetid pools of algae, feral cats, old coconut husks, and monkey shit.

Here I am struggling up the first pitch of Humanality. Jonathan Spitzer on the second pitch of Humanality.Rachel on the fourth pitch (crux?) of Humanality. A very memorable move.

Our second multipitch climb was on Ao Nang Tower. The access is unbeatable: we hired Lep and his longtail boat to drop us off at the first anchors and then pick us up a few hours later - complete with freehanging rappel directly into the bow of the boat. We climbed the 6c+ Orange Chandeliers route. Like many multipitch routes in Thailand, this one felt soft for the grade, but the climbing was fun nonetheless. The texture of sea-cliff limestone is always a bit scruffier than the tufa-rich limestone of the popular sport crags. Maybe that's because the jugs have not been worn to a polished sheen by an over-abundance of climbing chalk and C4 rubber. But I like it - to me the gritty and un-polished nature of the multi-pitch routes instills a greater sense of "adventure". The bolts are farther apart too - but never to the point of feeling reckless.

Ao Nang Tower from the bow of Lep's Long-TailRich Harthen on the third pitch of Ao Nang tower.Jonathan Spitzer rapping into the boat at the end of Ao Nang Tower. Jonathan sorts gear while Marilyne photographs Rich practicing his "blue steel" look.

Our third multipitch route was Thai-Tanium (you can guess what the bolts are made out of). To get there we hired Lep again (I sincerely hope I am writing his name correctly - He was always of the strong, silent type). Lep welcomed us aboard his long-tail for the 45-minute boat journey to Koh Yawabun Island. Had I stayed in Thailand longer, I would have loved a chance to dive here. Lep deftly manuvered his long-tail boat beneath the old, ratty chunk of fixed line dangling from the first set of anchors. We were lucky it was high tide. Jonathan brought a pair of ascenders for us to share. Being the MOG (Man-of-Girth) of the group, I jugged first - testing the fixed line with my 205Lbs. It held, and Rich (from AUS) followed. Then Rachel and Jonathan ascended to the anchor as Rich led the first 6c pitch. Lep retired to the rear of his boat, apparently asleep. A dive-boat pulled up next to us, 6 divers jumped in the water and disappeared. When their bubbles ascended to the surface so did an 1-meter long sea turtle. When the divers re-ascended the turtle silently slid into the green depths. I appreciated the mischievous game it was playing with them.

Rachel Greenberg on "to the members" (aka Thai-Tanium") Koh Yawabun Island, Thailand. There's a great no-hands rest on the third (6c+) pitch of "To the Members"/

Rich brought me up to the second pitch, which I led with great pleasure. Long reaches between in-cut jugs 200 feet over the glittering Andaman sea: it just doesn't get much better than this, does it? After Rich followed I shot some photos of Rachel leading. Then Rich led the third pitch - another 6b+ or 6c passage, but very sharp at the top. An eagle circled the summit of Koh Yawabun, inspecting us. I led the last pitch - a vertical slice of Karst with the sharpest holds I've never let go of - and clipped the sun-bleached assemblage of old, crusty anchor-slings. We rappelled the route directly into Lep's boat. The whip-crack of Jonathan's falling 70m rope was probably what alerted Lep to start the engine and maneuver the boat "into rappelling position".

We left the island just as a squall hit. Marble-sized rain drops smacked us in the face. We all hid beneath the tarpauline on the Long-tail, ignorant of poor Lep, back in the stern trying to steer the boat straight through growing waves and blinding rain. Jonathan's aversion to rough sees greatly amused all of us. We landed on the edge of Chicken Island (ostensibly to take photos and eat) and a more healthy pallor returned to Jonathan's face within minutes. An hour later we were braving the rough seas again, snickering at Jonathan's discomfort while simultaneously imagining "castaway" narratives that could happen if the boat were to break apart. I almost tossed him a life preserver from the pile of refuse in the bow, but I was afraid the "power of suggestion" might push him overboard - literally....

We only had another week or so to enjoy in Tonsai before our adventures would take us elsewhere so we made the most of it by enjoying more late breakfasts at the Pyramid cafe, taking whippers onto titanium glue-ins, dancing away a ribald new-years celebration, drinking endless coconut/mango shakes, and of course eating a never-ending supply of affordable and delicious thai food (and I wonder why I was heavier when I left...) I only managed to fit in two thai massages during my stay - what a travesty...